I JUST WANTED TO JOG

During my spare time, I would scroll my news feed on social media and I would come across lots of male models looking so properly built.
They would go shirtless and leave every female in awe.
I can never snap shirtless, it will be a great disaster and source of savagery.
Girls fantasized about these models so much and they were the current trend.
If your body was not according to the standard, then only money can attract a girl to you or perhaps God.

And here I am
No money
No abs
No proper sense of dressing
No direction in life
Just there, eating and attending classes in which I can't recall a thing.
And I expect someone's child to develop feelings for me.
That's not possible at all, if I wanted a girl I had to start somewhere and I had to start real quick.

I couldn't start with the money aspect because I was way broke beyond redemption, all my trails to make money always came crumbling down.
And without money, I would not be able to pimp my wardrobe to make it look outstanding and elegantly upright.

So I decided to start with building my body. I downloaded some working out apps recommend by Google.
I choose one special one and I began to work quickly.
The application told me that I would have six abs in less than five days.
I tried and tried but all it brought was pain and uneasiness.
My Mum saw my daily predicaments and suffering and opted to help.
She advised me to resort to the old method of staying fit which was through total exercise and jogging.

I am a very lazy type and I found it to be annoying and time consuming.
But it was the only way out. If I wanted a fit body, I had to go for it.
I kept days for my early morning jogging but they were not favourable enough.
I could not wake up during weekdays to begin jogging so I had to slot it for Friday and Saturday at most.
I started the jogging and I had a timer to ensure that I would not cheat.

I really wanted awesome results and I was ready for it, no matter how long it would take me.
In my city, we normally observe SANITATION, once in a month, one very special Saturday.

And during that Saturday, it is mandatory that every single person remains around his or her environment and cleans the place till 10am.
Police men and other forces are usually dispatched to ensure that people observe it.

Anyone caught doing something else during this times are usually beaten, penalized or even arrested as they say.
I have been told stories about them since I was little but I was never opportune to see them so I considered them as a great myth.

Why would men be patrolling and watching people work?
It has to be false.
The day for sanitation came, and every single person began to work whether indoors or outdoors.
I put on my jogging kit and I began to head out to the streets.
We did a lot of cleaning on Friday so we forfeited the  sanitation so we could rest.
Before I could leave the main door, I was interrupted by my mother and she was still sleepy.
She asked me where I was headed to and I told her I wanted to jog as usual.
She told me it was sanitation and that she won't let me out.
I told to relax and have some good sleep that I would be okay.
She tried to change my mind but I was way focused on getting the desired result on my body in no time.

I went back to my room and she thought she had succeeded.
I used the back gate to get out and began my journey.
I didn't charge my phone throughout the night so there was no need of carrying my earphones.
I picked my timer and wristwatch and zoomed off before she could notice.

My normal street that was usually silent was kinda busy with a lot people and they were all working.
If they could be outside, then I am free to do what I desire.
My street was a bit untarred and I did not enjoy jogging there.
I liked the streets where I could see a very clear view and some ladies too.

I headed out and in a few minutes I was on the road.
I was shocked of what my eyes beheld.
The streets were totally bare, no single car was passing.
No tricycles
No taxis
No buses
Just a few people on orange uniform with light yellow jackets sweeping the roads.

An inner instinct told me that jogging would be a bad idea but another voice, the voice that usually puts me in trouble told me that this is the best moment for a nice and efficient jog.

So I began some basic exercises to wake my muscles from their slumber and I began to bend down rapidly to exercise my waist.

I switched on my timer and started my jogging.
I passed my street and went far into other streets.
I came to a four-laned street which had four lanes and eight partitions.
The view of it empty was amazing.
I met some guys that were jogging too and I felt very relieved.
I didn't even believe that any person would come disturbing.

I loved moving at a slow pace so I would not get tired easily.
The guys that were on the road moved very quickly and even sang songs to keep them motivated
I felt like I had been wasting my time and I also felt that my slow pace jogging was the cause of my slow body building.

I started moving fast and I felt better
I went for about 45 minutes and I lost a lot of energy.
So I decided to sit down and gather back the lost energy
The speed I used was so much that I even dusted them and they were far behind.
While resting, I saw them coming towards me and they were moving real fast as though they were chased by a wild animal or something.

They were not jogging anymore but were running.
They passed me and were shouting "RUN" !!!
I was lost, why would they just tell me to run?
I stood up and checked what was behind them and I saw two white hilux cars coming towards me.

They were not just normal cars
They were police cars, then it dawned on me that I was in trouble.
But I was not scared at first, I thought if I could outrun them, then I can't be caught.

I started running quickly
I moved swiftly and I caught up with the other guys
We planned to split up so we could distract them
They can't catch us all I guess.

We were five in number plus me and we split and continued running individually.
One of the cars took a turn, entered an interior road while the other car continued the chase.

It caught one of the guys and hurled him into the back of the car.
They didn't wait for explanation and it started again to catch us all.
At this point, it was no longer funny and I was scared to my marrow.

We met at a point and continued running
One of us got tired and fell and he was picked and locked up.

While running, the other car came out from nowhere and blocked us.
We were all stuck and had to surrender.
A fierce looking man came down and looked at us with anger.
I almost urinated in my joggers and I was shaking badly.

He said "So because of you brats, I wasted my fuel and time"
He laughed an evil laughter and went to open the back of the car.
Another man asked "Why aren't you observing sanitation"

They was noise as we all tried to reply at once, and he ordered for Silence.
The fierce man which looked like the boss then said "Let's leave them for now....."

I smiled inside and thanked the heavens that it had ended but the man didn't complete  his statement.

He said, "Let's leave them for now......."
He walked towards us and completed his statement, "They would explain better at the station"
We were getting arrested, I've never been arrested in my entire life.
We were told to move into the car but one of the boys proved resistant and began to shift back.
The next thing I heard was a very loud slap and I saw him unconscious on the ground.

The slap made him faint on the spot. We that witnessed this unusual slap quickly entered the car without thinking twice.
The remaining police men carried him from the floor, dipped him in a nearby stagnant water and received him by force.

It was past 10am and my family must be worried by now.
I left my phone so there was no way to reach out to me at all.
I was in the back of car, driven to a station with total strangers.
We reached the station and I saw many of my kind.
The stubborn citizens, they were paraded and asked to write statements.
I could not call my mum because that would be another round of death and trouble.
I had to find a way out myself.

They took us to a huge field that was quite bushy and nasty.
We were to clear it to the ground.
They began to share partitions and took the rest to clean toilets in all the prison wards.
I had blisters all over my palm and I was really tired.
I reached home around 3pm and met another round of trouble


Mum was waiting outside and tapping her legs
Before I could step in, she told me to return to whomsoever house I went to.
She did not want to listen to my side of the story.

I was too weak to argue with her
I laid outside on the grass and fell asleep.
The vibes for the workout died that very day
I cannot kill myself over a fit body.

I prefer to make money
That would attract a lady quite easier than usual.
The body building can wait till another year.

I came to realization that the sanitation police was not a myth but pure reality.